martes, 12 de mayo de 2015

The anxiety of having anxiety

Don't get me wrong I have never been diagnosed with medical anxiety, but might as well have it. Over the last couple of weeks my estres levels and anxiety issues have increase to the point where I wake up in the middle of the night afraid and scared of ... well, what am I supposed to be scared of?.

I stumbled over this quote by Seth Godin: "I define anxiety as experiencing failure in advance". I have (since I remember) been always afraid of failure and disappointing people around me (all the time). But ever since I started therapy a year ago, been afraid all the time turn to be a more "well, whatever, I dunno what will happen, what's the worst that could happen?" and the fear was replaced with this magical spell of doing whatever I want and actually doing it (I felted that I could jump from a plane and It will be awesome...which I wont do. ever. yiaks. no).

But right now, I am afraid that I might be failing over not being afraid, the irony of the irony. I am experiencing failure in advance and I'm scared of experiencing failure in advance. Yoga has been doing its tricks but, guess I still need more therapy...*sigh*

I need a new mantra: The fear is a lie, the fear is a lie...the fear is.

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